Gartner: Zombies, Zombies Everywhere!!!

InsightaaS: The Gartner Blog Network collects posts from across Gartner’s research community. In this post, Gartner research director Jeff Brooks delivers the final segment of a trilogy that makes an unlikely but entertaining connection between infrastructure and operations (I&O) and zombies. We carried a link to the first installment in March, and the second installment earlier in April; the passage below is from installment #3, “Zombies, Zombies Everywhere!!!” In the boffo conclusion (and when’s the last time you were tempted to use “boffo” to describe a blog post?), Brooks shows that FCR may not be the sole key to assessing the efficacy of the support team…

 The Apocalypse Begins…

Through a laboratory window, William the area lab tech looks up when he hears what sounds like animals in the hallway. He notices both men, the blankness in their eyes, the blood covering their bodies and the slow methodical movement and quickly realizes the men had become zombies. He thinks to himself, “This can’t really be happening…can it?” William desperately searches for someone to call. He begins to frantically search BioZom’s many data bases and knowledge repositories. For reasons that William may never be able to explain, he types Zombie Attack into one of many search bars.  Shocked, one article is returned in the proposed solutions list. Title, “How To Deal With Zombies,” he clicks the link and a PDF opens. He notices the date of the article as February 2008, and features one prominent chart that shows the distribution of zombie types along with the most appropriate manner to destroy them.

Momentary glimmers of hope are suddenly dashed. William facepalms as he realizes  that this knowledgebase article hadn’t been updated in almost a decade and was basically worthless. Realizing this was going nowhere, the both zombies now walking through the door toward William, he has one last resort at his disposal. He picks up the phone on the desk and calls the IT service desk. The phone rings twice and within 30 seconds Jenna answers the phone. “How many I help you?” she states. William starts screaming into the phone, “Z…z…zombies….please help….arghhhhhhh!” The phone goes dead. Jenna turns to Timothy and declares, “He hung up…this is getting logged as a FCR ticket!” Timothy looks at her and says, “Fair enough, after all we have to beat those pesky industry benchmarks.”

Minutes later the zombie attack is out of control with BioZom employees being bitten and turned in every office and open space. More calls into the IT service desk finally clue Jenna into the fact that something may be happening. She asks Timothy if this is the time to declare a Major Incident. Timothy shrugs his shoulders and says, “I don’t know…I mean is it really a P1?” Erring on the side of caution, Timothy pulls out his red book…

Read the entire post:

PS – many thanks to Jeff for dropping by to comment after installment #2!


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